On The First Seven Days

In my last post, I gave myself a performance review and contemplated firing myself.  I gave myself 28 days to make some little, meaningful changes.  I've pasted those changes in at the bottom of this post if you need a refresher.  What follows are my notes on the first seven days...

Day One:  15 minutes on the elliptical felt like an hour.  The 10 push-ups were embarrassing, mostly because my right arm shook for like an hour after I did them.  I didn't yell at the cat.  Totally failed at not taking my phone out after dinner, but it was because an elderly friend had gotten his Facebook account spoofed and I had to work with him and explain that deactivating his account fixed absolutely nothing, so it was for noble reasons.  I am going to be sore tomorrow.  Listened to a meditation on Imagination, thought it was OK.  I got some sheets out of my truck that have been in there since October.

Day Two:  Had dinner with folks from the Dallas office, but still stuck to the plan- got my steps in and did my time on the cycle.  I'm grunting a lot today- getting out of chairs, going up stairs, walking.  I picked up a piece of quartz that has been sitting on the landing for weeks and plugged in a lamp in the bedroom that has been unplugged likely since we moved in.  Lettuce was the only vegetable today.  Was nice to the cat, but it was close when he went behind the dresser when I was plugging in the aforementioned lamp and wouldn't come out.  3 bottles o' water.  The meditation today was on the Heart Chakra- was basically about Foot Light, which I thought was odd.

Day Three:  Weighed myself and regretted it immensely. Ended up working late and didn't get cycle time today.  I paced the house like a madman to get to 5k steps, but I made it.   This led me to fail on the phone after dinner goal- I realized I was totally hitting it constantly while I was pacing.  I picked up a towel (lame!).  During meditation I realized that my toes move basically not at all.  This is because my big toes have no middle joints are are fused straight and the main muscle is shortened, but I need to work on my toes, dammit!

Day Four:  Had like 5 waters, and no beers.  I'm walking kind of like a chicken today- I plant my foot and my foot hurts so I jerk and then my knee/thigh hurts so I jerk the other way.  Took the dogs for a walk and then discovered a problem.  My steps counter is counting the strides on the elliptical cycle as steps.  So my 5k steps is including my cycle time.  So, do I now have to go for like 7k steps? Phone goal was pretty successful, but that was probably because dinner was at 9.

Day Five:  Asked a friend his opinion on the step counting and he thinks I need to up my step count to accommodate for the counter counting strides on the elliptical.  Thought about finding new friends. Wheels basically came off today; after a long work week I ran completely out of fucks to give by about two.  Plus side:  tons of water and lots of veggies.  Down side: way too many beers. Meditation was awesome and totally knocked me out.

Day Six:  Both in penance for the day prior and in acknowledgement of the day to come, I hit the ground running.  Weighed myself and have dropped five pounds, which seems suspect. I did 30 minutes on the cycle, and upped the push ups to 20.  I cleaned out the junk drawer- you know, the drawer in your kitchen where everything that you can't think of a better place for ends up?  Mine was so full that I couldn't close it.  I tossed probably half of what was in there and I'm hoping it will be a long while before my wife realizes what happened.  I also clipped the dog's nails.  This is as stressful on me as it is on them- they hate it.  But they're not clicking across the floor anymore- STEALTH WIENER MODE has been engaged!  My meditation choice was terrible; it reminded me of Spacestar Ordering on the IT Crowd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sarJtKM-Ku4.  Too much beer.

Day Seven:  30 minutes again, and 20 more push ups in the books.  Took the dogs for a nice walk. Vacuumed.  I hate vacuuming.  A lot.  This was a big deal for me. Got some good meditation selections from my wife.  Put one on, fired up an old set of wireless headphones and kissed the sky for about seven minutes before the voice of God rang out LOW BATTERY.  Nirvana failed to be achieved once again.

All in all, a good week.  21 more days to go!


For 28 Days....

- I will workout on the elliptical cycle for at least 15 minutes.  5 out of 7 days

- I will do at least 10 push-ups.  6 out of 7 days

- I will walk at least 5,000 steps.  6 out of 7 days
- I will eat at least one vegetable.  7 out of 7 days.  Lettuce was two of those days
- I will drink no more than two beers a day.  I will allow myself one cheat day.  4 out of 7 days
- I will floss every day. 7 for 7!
- I will make the bed every day.  7 for 7!
- I will meditate/breath deeply for five minutes.  6 1/2 out of 7 days- that Spacestar Ordering shit was shut off after like three minutes
- I will not take my phone out after dinner unless it rings.  2 out of 7 days
- I will stretch for five minutes every day.  6 out of 7 days
- I won't yell at Rusty unless he rubs his tooth against me or does a four paw testicle smash.  6 out of 7 days
- I will drink two big bottles of water every day.  7 out of 7
- I will fix/finish something. 7 out of 7

On 28 Days

It began, as these things so often do, whilst standing in front of an open refrigerator door, eating a Kraft Deli Single, and reading a Facebook post.

The post, written by an old friend, was a candid and introspective review of all aspects of his life, almost like a personal performance review.  After reading it, I'd give him a raise, for sure.

My life isn't bad by any means- hey, like the man once said, I've got a daytime job, I'm doin' alright". But there's a lot that I could be doing that I'm not while conversely there are things that I do that I shouldn't.

I've transcended what I called fat buff into just kinda fat.  I was doing really well until July when I hurt my foot and September when I jacked up my shoulder and exercise basically fell off.  I'm not pain adverse, but my mindset of allowing myself time to heal morphed into just hanging out.

I like cooking, and I like eating what I cook.  I eat out a lot as well.  Vegetables usually aren't on the menu, and I'm usually not one to turn down a chance to make a cream sauce.

I like beer.  A lot.  Pair this with a damn high tolerance and I can and do toss them back.

I'm not a religious person, but I do feel that I've become less spiritual over time; out of touch with the fabric of life.

I've allowed myself to become a bit undisciplined.  Arguably, I needed to in some respects, but I need some more rigor.

While my friend would get a raise after his performance review, I'd be lucky not to get terminated after mine.

I took the time to think about all of this, and I came up with a plan.  For some reason, 28 days stuck in my head as a good target.  I'm unclear why, but the Google revealed to me that 28 days is the typical duration of rehabilitation and further that the number 28 in Hebrew signifies both Power and Energy.  This all felt rather apropos, so on a Sunday evening I sat down and wrote out my list:

Don't worry, I'll write it out for you!

For 28 Days....

- I will workout on the elliptical cycle for at least 15 minutes.  My wife bought a $1500 elliptical on clearance for like $300.  It needs to be used.

- I will do at least 10 push-ups.  10 isn't much, I get it.  I'm trying to be sensitive to my shoulder.

- I will walk at least 5,000 steps. I get it, 10k is the real benchmark.  Starting out with realistic goals.

 It is not easy to get 10k steps in when you drive a desk all day.

- I will eat at least one vegetable.  Ideally, it won't be lettuce.

- I will drink no more than two beers a day.  I will allow myself one cheat day.

- I will floss every day. This is more about discipline than anything I guess.  Plus my wife bought a really nice water pick that she didn't use so I stole that sucker.

- I will make the bed every day.  Again, about discipline.  Also, I love crawling in to a made bed.

- I will meditate/breath deeply for five minutes.  Centering myself, getting back in touch.

- I will not take my phone out after dinner unless it rings.  To me, this is about getting back into the now, the present, seeing what is in front of me.  It also arguably felt like it was the most daunting.

- I will stretch for five minutes every day.  Maybe eventually I will be able to do a knee bend that goes above my waist again.

- I won't yell at Rusty unless he rubs his tooth against me or does a four paw testicle smash.  Rusty is a 16 year old tom cat that thinks I am his best friend in the world.  He's got a number of annoying habits, including caterwauling in the middle of meetings and in the middle of the night.  He's old, and he adores me.  I need to be nicer to him.

- I will drink two big bottles of water every day.  This is a big bottle:

- I will fix/finish something.  I can't count the number of little things there are in my life that I need to just take care of.  But I don't cause it isn't anything really material or pressing.  These little things can really weigh you down.

Every evening before bedtime, I'm taking a few minutes to jot down notes about the day- nothing Shakespearean; just enough to give me a flavor for the day- what I did, what I didn't do, what worked, what didn't.

I am writing this post on Day 8 of the 28 Days.  My subsequent posts will give a day by day breakdown of the 28 days in 7 day increments.  I'm looking forward to sharing this journey in an honest and humorous manner for those that choose to accompany me.

What will happen at the end of the 28 days?  I've no idea.  But I can't imagine it to be anything other than an improvement.

You can read about the first seven days here